Today I decided to look nice. Not that I don’t want to look nice all the time, but most days lately I wear jeans and a jumper. Nothing very exciting. Sure my boots cost me 160 quid but I don’t walk around with a big sign that says, “Hi. These are very expensive boots.”

Today I wore one of my favourite standby black dresses. I’ve had this thing for at least five years. I got it at JCrew for 19 dollars. It’s a polyester shirtdress that shows off my Marilyn Monroe tits and ass curves, while still being work appropriate. I paired it with my fuck me boots, a vintage Kelly bag, (no not a Hermès) pearls and red lipstick.

I was in the building for two minutes when I had received five compliments- three of them from women.

By the end of the day I had received at least eleven, “Wow, you look great, hot, elegant comments.” (I liked elegant best of all since that was what I was going for).

It does make you think however when you don’t usually hear a nice word about your appearance- that you must look like a dog every other day. It must be said however whenever I make an honest effort to look like a girl, people say nice things. It’s just that most of the time I can’t be assed. This is partly due to- 1. It’s winter. 2. I don’t fit in my cute clothes because of the current circumference of my ass.

I’m not a huge fashion addict, but I know what I like. While I may wear my boring jeans and jumpers, most of what the average London female wears is in my opinion beyond dire. But what do I know. . . Maybe leopard print ballet flats look fantastic with black flower patterned tights, koolats and a fuzzy sweater. Maybe the sun spins around the earth.

So while I’m not a big fashion whore, I know what looks good. Which is why I found myself really pissed off when Liz at work was giggling hysterically Monday when she found out that I was writing the fashion questions for the work pub quiz that the social committee will be putting on in the next month or so.

I chose to let it go and not make a snotty comment about the fact that she was wearing leg warmers. I guess the fact that she was a zygote in 1982 gives her a get out of jail card for what I consider one of the worst 1980’s fashion disasters.

In any case, since only maybe one or two people at work read this, I give you the fashion quiz questions.

Feel free to take it, post your answers in the comments and I will e-mail you the answers. No fair wikipediaing any of it. Go with your gut.

Something tells me that Liz will fail it.

Is it wrong that I feel pleasure about that?

No, my snootiness has nothing to do about the fact that she absolutely gorgeous. Nothing at all. . .

1.    Who said, “Fashions fade, style is eternal.”
A.    Yves Saint Laurent
B.    Coco Chanel
C.    Oscar Wilde

2.    Which Parisian fashion designer introduced the New Look silhouette popular in the 1950’ s- a mid-calf length full skirt, large bust and small waist?

3.    Chanel No. 5, the signature fragrance of The House of Chanel debuted in which year? 1910, 1921 or 1935.

4.    Translate Prêt-à-Porter into English.

5.    Carnaby Street was made popular of followers of what style in the 1960’s? Rockers, Hippies or Mods.

6.    True or False. Cardigans are named after the Earl of Cardigan who led the Charge of the Light Brigade into battle.

7.    What was the style of hat popular with flappers in the 1920’s?
A.    Beret
B.    Snood
C.    Cloche

8.    The zipper was invented in 1893 but was not wildly used in clothing until what decade? 1920’s, 1930’s or 1940’s.

9.    Oleg Cassini designed over 300 outfits for which American First Lady?

10.     True or False. Paul Poiret (1879- 1944) the first designer to break away from soft Edwardian styles and used vibrant primary colours is wildly considered to be the ‘Father of Haute Couture’.

11.     True or False. English fashion designer Mary Quant named the mini skirt after her favourite make of car, the mini.

12.    True or False.  The character of Miranda Priestly in The Devil Wears Prada is wildly believed to be based on Englishwoman Tina Brown, who author Lauren Weisberger worked with at Vanity Fair.

13.    What 1983 film inspired women to rip the collars out of their sweatshirts wearing them off of one shoulder?

14.    What actress did Hubert de Givenchy meet on the set of Sabrina and then went on to design almost all of the wardrobe worn in her films?

15.    True or False. Popularized by Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca and Peter Sellers in The Pink Panther films, the trench coat was created by Burberry during World War 1.

16.     True or False. Based out of Los Angles, California, American Apparels claim to fame is sweatshop free clothing.

17.    True or False. The first known use of the word ‘supermodel’ was in 1967.

18.     True or False. The British actress Jane Birkin who co-designed the famous Hermès Birkin bag, no longer carries hers because it gave her tendonitis.

19.     True or False. In 2005 British Designer Vivienne Westwood joined forces with the civil rights group Liberty and launched limited design T-shirts with the slogan, ‘I AM NOT A TERRORIST, please don’t arrest me.

20.     On January 25th Giorgio Armani’s couture line, Armani Prive, became the first couture show to be streamed live onto the Internet. “Couture has always been a closed world to all but a few,” said Armani. “Now, through the democracy of the Internet, we can provide a front row seat for everyone.”

The fashion show streamed worldwide at what Web site?

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