I love kids but am very happy that I don’t have them. One of my scripts I wrote a million years ago had a character that said, “We don’t want kids. We want dogs.”
I don’t know how some parents, especially in my industry do it. I love that I am able to go out after work and not stress taking care of a family or dealing with shrieking temper tantrums.
I’m happy being the cool Aunt- especially given that my nephews mothers are. . . sigh. . . shall we say, lacking certain skills? My stepfather once said, “Nicole is the only one that should have had kids.” I adore my nephews and the lunch dates out with them are some of my favourite memories.
When I was 20 and was first expressing the crazy thought that I would not have kids, a guy I worked with at the Utah Shakespearean Festival (Hey. Don’t laugh. It’s won a Tony) said, “You have to have kids Nicole. Smart people never breed.”
I dated him a few years later for a second probably because of that comment. (Telling me I’m pretty may make me like you, but tell me I am smart, I’ll have sex with you. I won’t say what I will do if you tell me I’m funny.)
So kids. Yeah.
One of my favourite bits from the David Mamet film State and Main is:
Joseph Turner White: You like kids?
Ann Black: Never saw the point of ‘em.
Joseph Turner White: Me neither.
So. Yeah. Kids, I don’t want kids.
Stuart doesn’t want kids.
I don’t want kids with Stuart.
I usually lie when making small talk with the mini cab drivers that drive me to the airport. 99.9 % of the time they are Muslim men that are married with children and when they ask if I have kids I say no and when they follow up with, “Someday?” I lie and I say, “Someday! Sure!”
Telling them I don’t want kids would just be too uncomfortable.
I don’t want kids. People know that about me. It isn’t new.
What you don’t know about me is that sometimes, I’m not sure why, I cry that I will never have a little hand reach out for me in the night. That I will never have a little soul call me Mommy or Mum or scream how much they hate me. That I will never say, “No, I can’t come out for drinks because someone is at home needing me.”
But I don’t want kids.
Really.
Honestly.
I have no interest in them.
(. . .Anyone who would have had a class with Davey would have known what I am doing. Those of you that have not had the opportunity are forgiven from not understanding that I am feeing rather sad. Actually, if I may be allowed. . . I am melancholy. But this shall pass. . . I am a verb. I will explain that later.
At some point.
Don’t worry.)
September 18th, 2007 at 11:47 pm
hear, hear!!
i cannot agree more with your sentiments.
i just wish more individuals and couples felt and thought the same way.
i got a dog to fill that need to be needed. it helps….it helps alot.