treefroggirl

posted by Thomas on Nov 28

I was incredibly grumpy yesterday. The night before hadn’t been a home run and the plan was that I was going to cook a mini Thanksgiving meal for Stuart and I. (Basically just a chicken and some potatoes.) I really wasn’t in the mood and was mentally planning on heating up a pizza.

Luckily Stuart without my asking made a booking at Bodean’s so while I didn’t have a traditional meal, it was close enough that I was happyish.

After, we played a few rounds of hangman on his iPhone at the pub. I left around 9:30 so I could call grand’rents and ‘rents.

Yesterday was my maternal grandparents 66th wedding anniversary, which is really an amazing thing. More amazing when you consider my Grandfather turned 93 a couple of weeks ago.

They live in a small little town in Nevada about an hour and half from Reno. They moved there when they retired in the 70’s.

Whenever I call I talk to Coco’s first, (I call them Coco’s and Papa) and we’ll make small talk then she’ll hand me to Papa. I have a window of 30 to 90 seconds with him, as he really doesn’t like the phone. I think it is partly his age and that he refuses to wear a hearing aid and also he just hates the phone. I think when he was 50 he might have been the same way.

Cocos used to be really chatty, talking with you for about 15 minutes to a half hour but the last few years she’ll get off the phone with me after a couple of minutes.

I wouldn’t know why if I didn’t speak to my mother, but I do know why. I just don’t push it. Yesterday was the first real indication of what she is trying to hide.

“Hi Coco’s! Happy Thanksgiving and Anniversary!”

“Oh hello! What a nice surprise. Guess who is in the room with me?”

“Papa?”

“Yes. Seen him all day.”

“I would hope so.”

We laugh.

She continues, “Yep, saw him at breakfast and at church.”

“Well that was nice of him.”

We laugh some more.

“Let me give you to him, she says.”

I hear the phone being handed to someone, and then a male voice says, “Hello?”

“Hi Papa! It’s Nicole! Happy Thanksgiving and anniversary!”

“What?”

Hi Papa!! It’s Nicole!! Happy Thanksgiving and anniversary!!”

“I’m sorry, I’m—“

I realise immediately I am not speaking to Papa.”

“–their neighbour. Your Grandmother thought you were my daughter. Let me give you to your Grandfather.”

In my 90 seconds with my 93 year old grandfather we wish each other a happy Thanksgiving and make jokes about some jail sentences being less than his 66 years of marriage, tell each other we love each other and he hands the phone back to Coco’s.

I can tell she’s embarrassed by her mistake. “You know I’m old. I can get confused.”

“I know Coco’s. Don’t worry.”

“Well, I love you and we love that husband of yours. It would be nice if you could get over to this country with him and come visit.”

“I wanted to ask you that actually. I’m coming to LA in April. My drivers licence has expired so I’ll have to figure out how to get to you from Reno, but could I come to visit for a couple of days?”

“Sure. Sure.”

“Great! We’ll talk more about it after the New Year and a bit closer to the time.”

“Sure. And we may not be alive.”

I feign annoyance at her saying such a thing. I tell her to knock on some wood and we laugh, but I have no idea if we are laughing at the same thing.

This summer when my Mom went to see them, Papa hugged her and whispered, “You may never see me again.”

I’m more than a little worried that I won’t.

posted by Thomas on Nov 25

I like to walk into bookstores with no idea of what I want or will find. Tonight around seven I found myself in the Books, etc steps away from work after I stayed at my desk late for a few reasons, the least of which being I was preparing for a training I am doing tomorrow. I was in the bookstore looking for a prop to occupy my mind at the dinner I was planning on taking myself to. I had my notebook, but I knew I wasn’t writing tonight.

I found their Poetry and Play section (why poetry and plays stuck together other than they probably are their worse sellers, I have no idea). Their idea of plays was some Ibsen, Williams, Miller, one Caryl Churchill and the collected works of Pinter.

My eyes caught a poetry collection called Two Cures For Love by Wendy Cope. I opened it and read the first poem.

I bought the book.

Later at dinner, I read the poem again.

By the Round Pond

You watch yourself. You watch the watcher too—
A ghostly figure on the garden wall.
And one of you is her, and one is you,
If either one of you exists at all.

How strange to be the one behind a face,
To have a name and know that it is yours,
To be in this particular green place,
To see a snail advance, to see it pause.

You sit quite still and wonder when you’ll go.
It could be now. Or now. Or now. You stay.
Who’s making up the plot? You’ll never know.
Minute after minute swims away.

I watched myself as I read it again and felt tears catch in my lashes. The me that was writing this in the moment thought, “And I burst into tears.”

I did not burst into tears. I blinked the pressure away. I took a sip of wine.

I turned the page.

posted by Thomas on Nov 22

“Never too old, never too sick, never too bad, never too late to start from scratch and begin again.”
- Bikram Choudhury

When I first heard about Bikram Yoga in Los Angeles I thought, “Oh hell no.” For those of you that are not familiar with it, it is the same series of poses done in an hour and a half in a room heated to 105°F (40°C)

Yoga was always one of those things I wanted to do, but I’m the sort of person that needs a class. I tried putting on a video or reading a book, but it doesn’t work for me. For so long being in LA sans car, it was just too difficult for me to get to a studio. So no yoga for me. When I did get my car, I started going 2, 3 times a week to a wonderful studio on Larchmont (one of my favourite streets to haunt in LA).

I had no interest in trying Bikram however.

Flash forward to here and I’ve stopped doing the yoga full stop.

Then a new studio opened up by our flat here in Balham and wouldn’t you know, it’s a Bikram. I decided to give it a go.

From Sunday to today I have gone every day except for Thursday and I feel guilty I had to miss that day. It’s amazing. It kicks your ass, but you feel so fantastic during and after. Even after a week I can feel my flexibility improve.

If you have a Bikram studio in your area, go check it out. (Mom- I would love to see you do this).

posted by Thomas on Nov 14

I am LONG overdue for this Meme…

RULES:

* Post at least five current addictions (with some details, please).
* Mention the person who started this meme (Being Brazen) and also the person who just tagged you – The Noble Savage.
* Type your post with the heading “Current addictions”.
* Tag at least two people and pass on the above rules.

1. Coffee

It’s a problem. Although today I am doing green tea but that is because we are out of milk and I am too lazy to go buy some. Started doing coffee at Uni. At first it was a necessary evil in order to stay awake when I was cramming- I had tried caffeine pills but had managed to give myself caffeine poisoning a couple of times. Not pleasant. Then I started to like the taste of coffee. If I let myself, I can have a pot or more a day.

2. Red Wine

When I was young, my parents would sometimes give us little glasses of wine on Christmas or Thanksgiving. I always gave mine to my sisters who happily gulped it down. (Portends of things to come.) It was vile. I used to think I didn’t like alcohol. Now I know that my parents just had really terrible taste. Luckily in the intervening years I have worked on my madre’s palate.

My problem with red wine is it is so easy to polish a bottle off in a night.

It’s a problem.

3. Ale

God bless the Sumerians.

Those of you that read this or my twitter feed or have been on the piss with me know that I can drink quite a few pints.

It’s a problem.

4. Sushi

I could eat sushi everyday. There is a restaurant in Old Town Pasadena (A’Float Sushi- is fantastic. Cheap yet still amazing) I would go to at least once a week when I worked there. When I walked in the door, one of the waiters always said “Hello, Miss Nicole.” The act of writing this is making me want to go get some sushi.

It’s a problem.

5. Torturing myself by looking at 1950’s inspired clothing I want to buy.

What Katie Did I could easily spend £500 right now there. I’ve wanted to go shopping for ages, but I have held myself back because I don’t want to drop the cash on a corset when I am the size I am at now. They also have a shop here in London, but I have controlled myself from visiting.

Candy Anthony Eveningwear and Bridal It’s probably a good thing I did not know about them when I was planning my wedding. What annoys me is this is exactly what I was looking for in the US and I couldn’t find anything. I have told myself when I turn 40 (years from now. well. two years. well year and eight months) that I am throwing myself a big stupid party and buying a bright scarlet dress from her and painting the town red.

ReVamp VintageBased in LA, they make designs for men and women based on styles from 1910-1950. I’ve never ordered from them, but they are on my clothing porn list.

Red Dress Shoppe When she had her brick and mortar shop in Pasadena and I was 30 pounds thinner, I spent a LOT of money here. Now she is only online.

Daddy-O’s See above about the money and weight. I have 20 dresses from there in my closet that I can’t fit in at the moment. Most of their stuff is from Stop Staring.

So. It’s clear I need to lay off the coffee, wine, beer and sushi so I can fit in the dresses I own and buy some new ones…

If you would like to do this meme, consider yourself tagged!

posted by Thomas on Nov 14

Sorry… I’m alive. All is well. I just have been feeling trite and unbloggy.

posted by Thomas on Nov 5

Yesterday was my third year arriving in the UK. I got a nice present.

posted by Thomas on Nov 5

Wow.

posted by Thomas on Nov 4

Really good

posted by Thomas on Nov 4

Just read a blog that has really wound me up.

I know Obama is not Jesus and that he can’t part the Red Sea.

I think I just mixed up my Biblical references.

Anyway.

I know Obama isn’t any biblical figure. I know that if he comes into office, I will disagree with him on some issues…

I am still proud to call him my candidate.

posted by Thomas on Nov 4

It’s been a long time since I voted for a canidate rather than against someone else. This is the first time however I have felt really passionate about who I am voting for. . . I thought I did in 1992, but my 22 year old self had no idea. She had no idea how the world would be so terribly different 16 years later. Reminds me of a Jon Stewart joke. . . Refering to George H.W. Bush he said, “Remember when we hated this guy?” Ahh, yes. Those were the days.

There’s something else I will be watching today… Prop 8 in California which is seeking to block same sex marriage. I hope it fails.

I know not all of you that read my raging against the light of day are on the same page as I am and that’s cool.

I’m going to be staying up all night tonight watching the returns. I’m not the praying sort but there will be a lot of nail biting. My joke status on twitter and Facebook right now is, “Nicole is trying to think positive but preparing herself for a broken heart. Sort of like the time she dated a drummer… but you know- different…”

I really will be a slight mess if my heart gets broken again, and it will be so much worse than four years ago. . .