Big thanks to the work mate that forwarded it to me. . .

America Rules England Sucks - Watch more free videos

A.O. Scott has been one of my favourite film critics for a while. His style is clear, he doesn’t get all uppity and snobby and sometimes he makes me laugh. His review for The Love Guru has a couple of inspired paragraphs.

Which might sum up “The Love Guru” in its entirety but only at the risk of grievously understating the movie’s awfulness. A whole new vocabulary seems to be required. To say that the movie is not funny is merely to affirm the obvious. The word “unfunny” surely applies to Mr. Myers’s obnoxious attempts to find mirth in physical and cultural differences but does not quite capture the strenuous unpleasantness of his performance. No, “The Love Guru” is downright antifunny, an experience that makes you wonder if you will ever laugh again.

And this is, come to think of it, something of an achievement. What is the opposite of a belly laugh? An interesting question, in a way, and to hear lines like “I think I just made a happy wee-wee” or “I’m making diarrhea noises in my cup” or to watch apprentice gurus attack one another with urine-soaked mops is to grasp the answer. Please don’t misunderstand: I’m not opposed to infantile, regressive, scatological humor. Indeed, I consider myself something of a connoisseur. Or maybe a glutton. So it’s not that I object to the idea of, say, witnessing elephants copulate on the ice in the middle of a Stanley Cup hockey match, or seeing a dwarf sent flying over the same ice by the shock of defibrillator paddles. But it will never be enough simply to do such things. They must be done well.

I have a feeling they won’t be using his quotes for the poster. . .

In my surfing travels, I come across an ad that may have the most inspired sentence EVER.

Are you looking for an international oriented and challenging career at one of the leading global engineering thermoplastic companies?

How did they know? Just this morning I thought, “I know! Thermoplastic Engineering!”

So funny

I think part of the reason I find it so hysterical is I have met people here with unusual surnames- names so bad I don’t know how they survived school.

I have no clue how John Oliver held himself together for this.

To the Paris Conference Center,

We have the room booked on the Xth of JuneXXXXXXXXXXXXXX. The audience in Internal. I sent an email earlier in the week with no reply…please let me know if there is someone else I should contact?

We would like to confirm with you the following:

• Projector & Screen (AV)
• Flip Chart in the room (pens)
• Speaker availability - Do you have speakers available for sound?
• Room Flexibility? - Can we have it set up as U-Shaped or Classroom Style? Is there a room coordinator who helps with the room set-up?

Your help is much appreciated. XXX is our contact in France for this course.

Kindest regards,

XXX

The first sentence of the reply back had me laughing so hard I was crying.

Hello XXX,

Unfortunately we aren’t concerned by your request.

A fart in our general direction indeed.